CD 32
6dpo
monitor: low
mood: tired
Temp. major dip - below coverline - just like last two non-pregnant months
phantom symptoms - boobs hurt a little and cramping- just like last two non-pregnant months
OK - so Phantom of the Opera was AWESOME! of course - the voices of the people on Broadway are incredible - I wish we all went together.
Something weird happened to me though - As soon as I came out of Penn Station I broke out in hives all over my face and legs - I looked like a prize fighter - once I went indoors it went away - only to return the next time I went outside. This happened 3 times and today my face is still puffy.
I know I should go to the doctor - but it is Saturday and the office is not open - and I have to work all day - If I am still swollen on Monday I will try to make an appointment.
Hope is dwindling for this cycle for me - I got a huge temp dip below the coverline today - normally - that would make someone excited right? Implantation Dip perhaps? But no - apparently I get this dip EVERY month at 6dpo - check out my Chart and you can see I am not just being pessimistic.
I am getting really frustrated - I don't want to go for the IUI - I don't want my husband to go through all of this testing - I want to get pregnant - why the hell can't I get pregnant???? My son has been talking about having a brother or sister lately. (His cousin has a little brother and now he wants one). It is so hard to explain to him "maybe someday" and it upsets me that I just can't give him what he wants - what we all want.
OK - I am going to stop now - it is going to be a long day and I don't want to dig myself deeper into this depression hole when I can't crawl under the covers and hide from the world.
I missed you guys yesterday. Hope to talk to you all soon.
3 comments:
Hi Jenn~
Glad you liked Phantom... it is a fun show... I dated a guy years ago that was Raoul in the National tour... and sometimes if the "real" phantom was sick he filled in... pretty fun huh? But... sadly he broke up with me and then turned gay... (Great for the self esteem!)
Sorry about the frustration.. we all feel it... I am testing tomorrow so I will probably be on the "Why/How am I still not pg?" bandwagon with you....
Hi Jenn,
Man, I miss talking to you. I hope you're feeling better. Don't get discouraged...anything could happen at this point. Time waiting sucks but hang in there...I'm gonna be waiting right along with ya. :)
Jenn,
I love the phantom too. It is so good. Have you seen the movie yet? They did an awesome job. That is weird about the hives. I hope they are better today.
I am sorry that you are down this month. It must be something inthe air. I hope you feel better. you are in my thoughts.
Jenna
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